When the Light Returns: A Journey Through Darkness

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04/23/25 • 71 min

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Recovery Unfiltered

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Grief has no timeline, but what happens when it consumes your entire life for 17 years? In this raw and unflinching conversation, Mike and Jason share their parallel journeys through unthinkable tragedy—both losing teenage sons in the same accident in 2007.
Mike's candid testimony reveals how alcohol became his only coping mechanism after his son Michael's death. "I felt that there's no way I could ever be okay again with this tragedy," he confesses, describing years spent driving drunk, hiding vodka bottles, and pushing away his grieving wife who feared she would soon bury him too. Despite multiple rehab attempts and hospitalizations for pancreatitis, true recovery remained elusive.
What makes their story extraordinary is the bond formed through shared grief. Despite his own pain, Mike dedicated himself to helping Jason's injured son Tyler experience life—taking him driving, shooting, and to wrestling tournaments, all while battling his own demons. "He just let him be the most human being that he could be," Jason acknowledges, expressing profound gratitude for these moments before his own son passed.
The turning point came just eight months before this recording when Mike finally surrendered to recovery. Now both men walk a path of healing, with Jason urging Mike to complete the 12 steps that transformed his own life: "I'm living like that never happened," he says of his trauma, a statement that seems impossible to those still drowning in grief.
Their conversation offers hope to anyone convinced they'll never emerge from darkness. As Mike slowly discovers, healing doesn't mean forgetting—it means finding a way to honor memories while embracing life again.
If you're struggling with addiction, grief, or loss, please reach out to [email protected]. Recovery is always possible, no matter how long you've been suffering.

Thank You for Joining Us.. Please share with friends. If you or anyone you know is struggling with alcoholism please reach out to us. We can get you help. [email protected]

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Thank You for Joining Us.. Please share with friends. If you or anyone you know is struggling with alcoholism please reach out to us. We can get you help. [email protected]

Previous Episode

When Your Past Shapes Your Present: A Story of Fatherhood, Loss, and Healing

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Mike S pulls no punches as he shares the story of his turbulent childhood with an alcoholic, abusive father in Oakdale, California. Born into chaos, Mike describes how he'd be locked in his room until his father came home, only to receive brutal beatings that went far beyond normal discipline. "I grew up getting beat like that," he explains, "and I always joke I think I started to like it because I was stubborn."
When Mike was just 12, his life took another devastating turn—coming home from school to find the house emptied out, his mother and sisters gone. Left with only his 17-year-old brother as a parental figure, they survived out of a Coleman cooler until they found housing. These early experiences shaped Mike profoundly, instilling in him a fierce determination to be everything his father wasn't.
At 17, Mike joined the Marine Corps, escaping his chaotic upbringing and excelling in the structured environment. Despite being surrounded by Marines who drank heavily, Mike initially avoided alcohol, haunted by the memories of his father's behavior. It wasn't until his first marriage collapsed—after his son Joseph was born—that Mike began drinking regularly and experimenting with cocaine.
The story takes a heart-wrenching turn when Joseph, after coming to live with Mike and his new wife Kim, is struck by a car in a crosswalk, suffering a traumatic brain injury that left him in a coma. As Mike recounts the agonizing hospital vigil and uncertain prognosis, we see the seeds of the profound connection that would later form between Mike and Jason, whose son Tyler would experience similar trauma.
This raw conversation doesn't just chronicle a series of tragedies—it reveals how our deepest wounds can become unexpected bridges to others. Mike's unflinching honesty about his struggles with addiction, fatherhood, and breaking generational cycles offers a powerful reminder that sometimes the people who understand us best are those who've walked through similar fires.
Have you experienced trauma that still affects your relationships today? We'd love to hear your story at [email protected].

Thank You for Joining Us.. Please share with friends. If you or anyone you know is struggling with alcoholism please reach out to us. We can get you help. [email protected]

Next Episode

Healing the Open Wound: The Power of Sponsorship

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Sometimes God moves in unmistakable ways. For Larry, it happened during a Saturday morning meeting when a newcomer named Blake shared his story. A warm feeling washed over him—what he calls "God's spiritual two-by-four"—and he knew instantly he needed to sponsor this man despite his previous reluctance to take on sponsees.
This powerful moment opens a deeply authentic conversation about what makes sponsorship work, fail, or transform lives. Rob and Larry explore the critical timing of recovery, using the striking metaphor of a newcomer as "an open wound"—one that will either be properly healed through working the steps with a sponsor or merely scabbed over by time, destined to crack open again.
Drawing from their years in recovery, they outline the essential elements of effective sponsorship: radical honesty, confidentiality, respect for each other's time, and allowing someone the freedom to seek guidance elsewhere if needed. They don't shy away from discussing sponsorship failures, including Larry's early missteps when his motives centered more around ego than service.
Throughout the episode, the spiritual foundation of recovery shines through. "God hits a moving target," they emphasize, explaining how prayer must be paired with action. "If you're going to worry, don't pray. If you're going to pray, don't worry." These aren't just platitudes but hard-earned wisdom from men who've experienced both sides of the sponsorship relationship.
Whether you're considering becoming a sponsor, looking for one, or simply want to understand this vital recovery relationship better, this conversation offers raw, unfiltered insights that cut through recovery clichés to the heart of what really works.

Thank You for Joining Us.. Please share with friends. If you or anyone you know is struggling with alcoholism please reach out to us. We can get you help. [email protected]